Air

From the very first breath, I have inhaled an uncharted future. I have suckled on this air. It has sustained me.

More than sufficient. One day blends into another. An endless sky of opportunity. It is so vast that I cannot possibly grasp it. I cannot capture the end of it. I cannot see where it will lead me. Rolling clouds obscure the route ahead. And yet, I walk on, treading tentatively on a path that no other has explored. This is my air. My sky. It is my future, and it will change as sure as the clouds expand and diminish in an everlasting blender.

Behind me violent winds have blown my memories away, like leaves swept up in heaps beneath the autumn oaks. I can see them all, but I don't know which are mine, which came first, which I chose and which chose me. They tumble together in a confused vortex, and I am unable to claim even one from the mayhem. I leave them there. What use are they to me now?

A breeze turns my head to the east. Always to the east. The horizon is glowing orange in anticipation of a new day. I breathe. In. Out. It is a wonder how this air keeps me. Always enough. A life offering a life.

The sky is tattooed with pearly clouds. They swirl in gentle synchrony, guiding me, calling me. I am reluctant to step out onto the invisible pathway. I breathe. In. Out. The clouds billow and beckon, growing heavy and grey in their urgency. I wish I didn't feel afraid. I am buffeted by strong winds blasting at my back. They push me forward. Forcing me into a frightening uncertainty.

I choke. The air has become thick. It presses on my chest. My lungs are heavy. I falter. I fall through the heavens, and the heavens break my fall. There is no escaping this air. This air is my life. It holds the past in windswept troughs, and presents the future in mutating cloud formations. I cannot adequately describe just how big and completely inescapable it is.

I breathe. In. Out.

Tomorrow there will be more.