If I had my way

  I am not a chic or sophisticated eleganté (New word. It's a noun. In french ~ because it has an accentuated 'e' at the end ~ It refers to someone who is graceful, debonaire and charming). And it's not to say I wouldn't like to look like I just stepped off a Queenspark photo shoot. But I'm just not that suavish, fancy type. 

I would so love to have a magical hour all to myself every morning where I could consult with my wardrobe assistant and stylist as to the look we were going for for that day (a la Oprah). I mean, duh! what girl doesn't want to look like a million bucks a million percent of the time? I'm talking hair, nails, make-up, shoes - the whole toot! I could be fantashtic (It means super. With attitude.)

Reality stinks a bit, though, doesn't it? (That question was not directed at any woman who sports a french manicure and Jimmy Choos. Oh, and my mother-in-law. No, it was aimed at the girl with the dark rings under her eyes, the nappy-bag indentation over her right shoulder, and the porridge fingerprints on the back of her pants that she's only going to discover when she goes to bed tonight.)

Yip. Reality smells a bit like household detergent and bunny pee, oh, and the occasional unflushed toilet. To me, anyway.

Take make-up as a f' instance. I'm not a make-up diva (as those who know me will attest to), and perhaps, some of that has to do with my upbringing. I wear make-up when I feel make-uppy (new word: means "to do with make-up"). I don't want to spend an extra 15 minutes putting on my make-up in the morning just to drop the kids off at school, when all I'm going to do, when I get back home, is bury myself in the bedcovers. So I won't. If you don't mind. And that's ok, because it lets me be true to myself. I can just be me. No pressure. Sure, there are days when I actually feel like make-up, and, on those days, I will have the energy to get up that half an hour earlier to apply it. But, generally, the inspiration for make-up on a laundry day is lacking.

As far as my clothing goes, well, er, let's see. If I look like crap, I might be pre-menstrual. OR I might just be out of clean clothing (which tends to happen when I'm pre-menstrual, because I just can't face doing another load of washing when I'm all bloated and pimply). OR, sometimes, I look lousy because I have plans to repaint a wall, or repot a tree, or sort out the STUFF in my study (which, by now, is a permanent feature), so I've dressed for the part. And there are sometimes that I turn up in scrubby clothes just because if I could have, I would have been in my pyjamas, and this was my best effort at dressing up while being totally absorbed in PJthink (Another new word. Means that all you can think about is pyjamas. May also include slippers from time to time). At times like these, I feel people can at least appreciate my cladding efforts a bit. It's really hard to co-ordinate an outfit when you have visions of brushed cotton and loose elastic floating around in your head.

Talking about clothing, remind me to tell you about the Pants Curse I have - it's tragic, really, but I think you'd enjoy it.

My gown is calling. Toodles!