Monday, February 23, 2009

Headspace Real Estate


For Sale: One highly cluttered apartment. Narrow views. Built in cupboards overflowing with useless information and copious amounts of guilt. Mostly crowded living areas. Current location somewhere near a toxic power plant which, on the one hand, provides fantastic amounts of power to function on a daily basis, and, on the other hand, fumigates the air with noxious gases (inhaling these fumes may lead to headaches, ravenous hunger, night sweats, panic attacks, inexplicable drops in blood pressure followed by vertigo and nausea, insomnia, confusion and the inability to control heavy machinery).

Wanted: Wide open spaces so I can breathe easy. Air-conditioning is acceptable, however, country air allowing for a fresh point of view would be better. Uncomplicated design an absolute necessity. Open and ample living areas leading to optimal living.  I seek a space where I can think clearly, sleep deeply, laugh loudly, live freely and love uninhibited. Preferably not located within asylum property. Space must sufficiently incorporate both adult and children's facilities. A short commute to reality preferable. Not interested in any renovator's dream - headspace must be spacious, uncluttered and in good working order. 

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